This was a breath of fresh air, thank you. It's frustrating being caught in the false dichotomy of "only legal/social parents" vs. "only biological parents." All of them are part of the reality of the child's life, and all of them matter. But it's lonely having this view in the gay world. There's this assumption that I should feel threatened by any acknowledgment of my kid's biological father, and it makes me sad — I'm not fragile, so why should I be afraid of the truth? (Plus, I picked him and I think he's pretty great.)
Thank you so much. I completely agree -- and from everything I've read, parents who put their own feelings (and agenda) first end up pushing their kids away, because the kids feel like they can't be honest about how they feel. So you're doing the right thing for both of you.
I never thought of all this. Thank you for clarity and expansion of these issues.
This was a breath of fresh air, thank you. It's frustrating being caught in the false dichotomy of "only legal/social parents" vs. "only biological parents." All of them are part of the reality of the child's life, and all of them matter. But it's lonely having this view in the gay world. There's this assumption that I should feel threatened by any acknowledgment of my kid's biological father, and it makes me sad — I'm not fragile, so why should I be afraid of the truth? (Plus, I picked him and I think he's pretty great.)
Thank you so much. I completely agree -- and from everything I've read, parents who put their own feelings (and agenda) first end up pushing their kids away, because the kids feel like they can't be honest about how they feel. So you're doing the right thing for both of you.